July 3

Hi dad. It's July 4th eve. Sitting here listening to all the idiots blowing up their money. Should be stopping soon, hopefully. I know how much you n mom just 'loved' this time of year. Poor Snickee. I know he'll be scared silly. Mom n him will be here Sunday. For the week. :) I'm glad she's coming. Cuz when it's all said n done all you get together is time and memories. I don't know what we'll do but we'll do it together. Give her some time away from laundry. Blecky laundry. I wish I could go see her instead but I can't. No fundage. Plus we gotta work. 

Ima start a new job this next week. I'm kinda excited. Ima be working with my old boss from Krystal n this girl I used to work with too. Gonna be a team trainer at Taco Bell. Idk what that means or entails but it's a new adventure as mom might say. She hired me on the spot, soon as I saw her. Only downfall is I gotta drive to Ooltewah which is about 20 minutes from here. Keep an eye on me, ok? Cuz it's all interstate driving. I hate the interstate. But things just aren't working at Zaxbys. I just don't fit in, hard as I try. I'm quiet when I'm around ppl I'm not comfortable around so all day I don't say much except to the customers and the extremely few ppl who do talk to me. Makes for a tension filled day. I've had a headache since Wednesday when my boss pulled me aside and told me she won't give me the days off I asked for to spend with mom. I asked what can we do, she said that's not the discussion. Then said maybe you should just spend the week with your mom. Ok...fine I will. :)  I was gonna see if there was something we could work out but Deanna offered me the job n hired me so hasta la vista baby..I won't be back. I have a terrible habit of totally incinerating every bridge after I cross them. Idk, might have to work on that. Lol. Idk daddy. Just get tired of being walked on and I hate confrontation (I cry, stammer, get embarrassed cuz I'm so mad) so it's easier for me to say to heck with it and walk away n never look back. I know it's not the most mature way to handle things but it's my way. 

Ima have to check out my car, the tires n belts n fluids n all, make sure I'll be ok since I'll definitely need my car for work. My schedule is most likely going to be for a little while anyway, 5am-3pm...idk for sure yet. I go on Tuesday n do paperwork n she told me I was gonna be on the next schedule. The weeks run from Wednesday to Tuesday. Kinda different. Just hope it lasts for a long time this time cuz ima bout tired of trying to find jobs where I'm comfortable n feel like I belong. Or am wanted there. I know Deanna will take good care of me. :) She always did at Krystal. 

Idk much else. Me n Joe are still great, he's still treating your baby girl like a queen. I get stupid thoughts n worries in my head about him leaving me or breaking my heart but he stops me and tells me I'm being silly. That he loves me and ain't leaving. :) Idk why I think like that, I guess cuz S did. I think Joe is absolutely adorable and positively wonderful, so I worry someone will take away my happy. Things are going so good I worry something is gonna happen to ruin said happiness. But I also know Joe is pretty crazy about me too and I'm being silly. 

Oh...Joe has been training for what he thought was shift manager, one of the other SMs n him were talking the other night n she slipped n said something about them training him for assistant manager! He was like, What?! N she said oops. I wasn't supposed to say anything. So then he got to thinking about things and realizes now the things he's been doing aren't shift mgr things, but asst mgr stuff. I am so so proud of him! He's been working 5-2s this week. He thinks he's gonna keep doing those hrs..idk..but if that's the hours I get it'll be great cuz our sleep schedules will be pretty much the same n we'll be able to be together in our off time. Sometimes I worry he'll tire of spending so much time with me but he tells me things like, there's no place else he'd rather be. Good...cuz me either! 

Guess ima go to bed. I love you daddy. (Forehead kiss) Talk to you in a little bit.